Three months later and twenty-five pounds heavier I graduated from Marine Corps Recruit Depot San Diego. I was in the best physical condition of my life getting perfect scores on the pull-up and sit-up portion of the physical fitness test and coming in at nineteen minutes on the three mile run. One minute over for a perfect score, I was pissed; I should have pushed myself harder. That is a lesson a take with me every day. Maybe that is why I push myself to what some have expressed are impossible extremes.
This is nowhere more apparent than in my romantic relationships. When I choose to cross that line from friend or acquaintance to lover there is no going back for me. Is that healthy, I don’t know, but when I commit myself to a woman in that way I am theirs and theirs alone. I learned recently that is a fairly common trait for Aries, of which I am one.
Of course the drawback to this is that when the relationships end it is emotionally devastating for me. Luckily it is not a regular occurrence for me, although in the last year there have been two women that I have felt this way about. They both ended very badly due to this character trait. I’ve actually decided to get some counseling to see if I can temper this reaction.
It’s like there is a switch in my subconscious that flips the minute someone says you’ll never do that, or you can’t have that. My mind races with, “oh yeah, I’ll show you. I’ll prove you wrong,” very good trait to have in business, very bad trait to exercise in the courting process. This tendency to lie within the extremes of all or nothing is the only thing that pushes me forward when obstacles occur in my path. I have committed to Stigmare and ECFW with all my heart and soul. They will not fail, my honor won’t allow it.
As much as it pains me, I hope that you find this constructive. I think what you view as openness, transparency, and maybe even public therapy has led you astray of your goals. Your brand (at least for me) is no longer associated with fashion, perseverance, or whatever else you might want it to be. Rather, when I now see your face or hear your name, I primarily think about what is happening in your personal life, which is a problem for you in the grand scheme of things. Now, indulge me here, but would you rather do business with a lifestyle branding consultant whose name evokes images of thought leadership and success or one whose name evokes images of something completely unrelated (in this case, romantic problems, crying, etc)?
ReplyDeleteMost people can stand to lose the chance to make one or two business deals in their lifetimes, but things like this do not affect just one or two business deals or personal relationships. This is your reputation, and you are tying it to an image that conflicts with what appears to be your other life goals. If your primary goal is to get all of this out and your secondary goals are the success of Stigmare and ECFW, you need to understand that your sharing your personal story may come at the expense of Stigmare and ECFW, because let me re-iterate...You are damaging your brand and putting other things before both of those ventures.
If you asked me for some advice, I would say two things:
1. Stop talking about personal issues unless they somehow enhance your brand.
2. If you are really that committed to Stigmare and ECFW, focus only on what those 2 ventures need to succeed.
wow. nice photo. I do understand and agree with the all Or nothing way, since I too spend time in the military. Another thing I learned is that things happen for a reason and you have to roll with the punches, so if you give it your all and it doesn't turn out the way you want it, you deal with it. I think that the all or nothing approach will be perfect with the right person and companies are lucky to have such a dedicated person
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with what anonymous said..since ECFW and Stigmare are so intertwined with you, when I think of those two brands, I think of you, and when I think of you, I think of someone who is most of the time RTing other people, and doesn't contribute much to twitter, and more often than not talking about his love life or lack thereof...not a good thing for either ECFW or Stigmare.
ReplyDeleteThis is some really great feed back and I thank each of you for contributing. It's given me some great food for thought, and I think maybe an additional blog post or two.
ReplyDeleteI admit I have been a bit distracted of late and not contributed the content I once did to the conversation on Twitter. Thank you for the courage to point out my recent short comings.